Girlfriend driving me crazy
30 posts • Page 1 of 3
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fihsboy - Posts: 1837
- Joined: Wed Mar 19, 2008 4:20 pm
Girlfriend driving me crazy
Ive been dating this girl almost three years..and theres always up's and down's.......its life....But this past week......holy crap! She's on her you know what....which i give her a lot of slack when that happens cause im sure that would suck. Anyways, she keeps talkin about marriage....left and right.........I cant talk to her without her bringing up one of her friends getting married or w/e. Its starting to piss me off.........seariously.....Ive told her I want to be with her.......but shes going to have to be patient......im not made of money. plus we are 20 and 18....its going to be at least another year. And she just gets all poopy...To be blunt....shes been a bitch these past two weeks......shes either sad or crabby...And no matter what I do...I cant change it. Opinions?
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Snowboss4492 - Posts: 2098
- Joined: Sun Jan 27, 2008 11:24 pm
what about a long engagement...............i was engaged for 1 1/2 before i married my wife, my uncle was engaged for 6 years, my lil brother is gonna be enggaged for 2 yrs when they get married
also, im sure you get it from all sides, but 20 and 18 is still pretty young................why rush?.............if she's insecure now, a ring isn't gonna fix that.............if you not ready you will feel like she forced you down the road........if it's meant to be it will be my friend
AND OMG i feel for you man, right now is NOT the time to be making any life choices...........lol ............ my wife is off limits for 1 1/2 weeks emotionally ......lol and i can't do anything right ................it's just life bud
Boss
also, im sure you get it from all sides, but 20 and 18 is still pretty young................why rush?.............if she's insecure now, a ring isn't gonna fix that.............if you not ready you will feel like she forced you down the road........if it's meant to be it will be my friend
AND OMG i feel for you man, right now is NOT the time to be making any life choices...........lol ............ my wife is off limits for 1 1/2 weeks emotionally ......lol and i can't do anything right ................it's just life bud
Boss
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fihsboy - Posts: 1837
- Joined: Wed Mar 19, 2008 4:20 pm
haha. glad its going around. we talked about it....and said its going to be at least till we get out of college......another 2 years. She just wants the ring, shes got a 3/4ths carat promise ring.....so I dunno why she wants THE ring.....but she does. Im not getting her crap......im getting her what I think she deserves.....and shes VERY impatient. haha. plus shes on TOM. soo yeah. (Time Of Month) Every guy hates TOM. hes a bastard.
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kei9th - Posts: 73
- Joined: Mon Aug 18, 2008 5:59 pm
tell her the statistics 70% of all ,marriages fail within the first 6 months. 50% off all marriages fail completely. 80% of second marriages fail. it costs twice as much to get a divorce than it cost to get married. just get a joint bank account and give her a nice diamond. ive been with my girl for 8 years and that is how i got out of being married. now we have a kid he has my last name and i refuse to be married. ask her how many friends she has that have the same mom and dad they were born with. i know of only two friends, one has the same birth parents for 19 years, but they are not married. the second has his same birth parents, but his dad was married three times before and his mom was married twice before. maiiidge dosent wor in the long run plus youre way to young. im 28 and have always had serious relationships since i was 13.last sunday my girls mom took our son for the day and she had to go to work. i had 8 hours by myself. i went to the local sports bar ordered a bucket of beer some wings and watched a football game all by myself. i never did that ever before, i know now i missed out on alot, .dont let that be you. i missed out on being a bachelor your young be a bachelor. i regret on the bachelor times.
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gumbii - Posts: 1695
- Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2007 3:31 am
girl's don't respond well to logic and statistics... lol... just talk to her and tell her how you feel... don't lie... just let her have it... if she doesn't like it oh well... tell her to get used to it...
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zum14 - Posts: 36
- Joined: Sun Jan 04, 2009 10:39 pm
Ok im sure any man in a relationship can agree that when a girl is broken its udder hell, but to quote snowboss its life, im fairly lucky, i met my new wife in school and well it didnt matter on the girl but i had a personal rule, I had to date her for at least 5 years before id even contemplate the decision of asking that question, i had to me more sure of this than any other decision in life, your not buying a car here, but i think what helped the most was that i told her that, she knew i wouldnt, she new i strongly belived that and wouldnt cave.(not religious just personal) Of course women being women she tried to bring it up well around the 3rd year mark, all i really said is that i didnt want to hear it and well jokingly threatend that i wouldnt ask at all if she kept bringing it up. Theres always tiffs and rocks and ups and downs. thats a relationship. But the biggest thing i can suggest, is to be open with it. if she cares and is the right girl, she will understand that its not that you dont love her or want to be with her but that marriage is not taken seriously enough anymore and by people not making proper sound decisions they only add to the statistics kei9th stated. At that 5 year mark i made the best choice of my life and asked, well the answer is obvious but i regret nothing, that is also important, because regrets never leave. they will always be there so if there is doubt, regret, anything, deal with it now before you make any choices, they are the true tests of a relationship. if it makes it you know shes a keeper, better to find out before, divorces are expensive. The first 7 years of marriage are the hardest and test the most, were 6 months in and well were not tired of each other yet so heres hopein.
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kei9th - Posts: 73
- Joined: Mon Aug 18, 2008 5:59 pm
im very sure my statistics are not correct. i just wanted to interject some humor into the situation. i dont believe that in this day and time marriage works. there a few extreme cases where it does, but they are few and far between. fihsboy i think youre way young to even be thinking about marriage. you both should experieence some life. i think you should hold on to each other, and try to have some great adventures. marriage is forever. (until the divorce)
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Tmercier834747 - Posts: 887
- Joined: Wed Feb 13, 2008 8:33 pm
yeah, I agree wholeheartedly about age. I'm almost 26 now, my girlfriend turned 27 in december and marriage comes up a lot. I really hear gumbii. There will come a time when you'll understand just how hard it is to get your girlfriend to understand things logically (sorry ladies but in my experience this goes with any woman lol). Not like spock shit..just your every day general logic lol. Like the ongoing fight we have about me doing filter maintenance in the kitchen sink. My arguement: Its stainless steel, I use antibacterial soap on the whole thing when I'm done, I'm not sloppy and don't leave weeks of fish shit in the dish drainer. Hers: I don't care, I put food in that sink! There's that whole men from mars women from venus thing in a nutshell.
If there's one thing you can try to hammer home to her such as keith pointed out is something most people don't seem to f'ing understand including both of my parents: Marriage is supposed to be a life-long commitment. I'm not talking about in the eyes of god or whatever religion you follow. I mean like...people who enter that kind of commitment are supposed to (simply put) BE COMMITTED. If anything I think boss has the right idea. If you really thinkg you're made for each other get engaged and that will help her cope with the emotional commitment she wants for now. But if she's going to push that hard then there may be something wrong.
I think I read somewhere the average wedding now costs $25,000. I'd rather have a new car...
If there's one thing you can try to hammer home to her such as keith pointed out is something most people don't seem to f'ing understand including both of my parents: Marriage is supposed to be a life-long commitment. I'm not talking about in the eyes of god or whatever religion you follow. I mean like...people who enter that kind of commitment are supposed to (simply put) BE COMMITTED. If anything I think boss has the right idea. If you really thinkg you're made for each other get engaged and that will help her cope with the emotional commitment she wants for now. But if she's going to push that hard then there may be something wrong.
I think I read somewhere the average wedding now costs $25,000. I'd rather have a new car...